Monday, January 26, 2009

New Program announcement

Hi, just thought I would drop by to let you all know I'm inventing a new TV program. It's like a soap opera that will debut on TV at around 7 or 8 a.m. each morning. It's called a breakfast serial.

Anyway, what reminded me about this was a social networking site where somebody tagged me with a serial "25 Things you may not no about such-and-such. It was filled with all these great things and it compelled me to write my own list. When I wrote them, some of these things made me say "Wow, I didn't know that," while others were like, "Wow, what the hell was I thinking."
So, here goes with "25 Things you may not know about Tom Murphy"

-Subsisted on nothing but breakfast cereal for an entire 36-hour period.
-Only knows three cords.
-Is writing a screen play with the working title “Zombies vs. Wookies.”
-Never ate meatloaf in a Chinese restaurant
-Has the West Coast’s largest collection of RJ Umberger rookie mini hockey pucks.
-Doesn’t know who SJ Sharkey is and has never seen him in public place.
-Once flubbed the lyrics to an Inbred Mutants’ song in a karaoke bar in Kuching, Malaysia.
-Would never sit down in the snack bar at a nudist colony.
-Once acquired unsubstantiated visions of grandeur.
-Made two unforgettable guest appearances with the legendary Travelin’ Band during it's historical Brownie’s Lodge concerts.
-Lets his good buddy Don Julio do all the talkin’.
-In a conversation about the economy, once said “At least it’s not like ‘Slumdog Millionaire’ yet.”
-Vocalizes his dog’s thoughts in falsetto.
-Stays in the merge lane as long as possible.
-Once emptied a ketchup packet underneath the door handle of a car that was IN MY SPOT.
-Quickly considered but resolutely declined an opportunity to buy a Sham Wow! in Target.
-Never read MAD magazine and despises its particular brand of humor.
-Is under the false impression that hand drums make the neighbors more polite.
-Frequently pays no nevermind.
-Was surprised to see a topographical map of his buttocks hanging in the Panamanian Pickpocket Association’s Hall of Fame.
-Maintains a healthy diet by being nice to the waiter.
-Is a lot more cynical than he shows.
-Subscribes to every notion he comes across, whether good or bad.
-Once split an infinitive in a room full of editors.
-Asks rhetorically, “What are you looking at?”
-Saw Ditka once at Chicago’s O’Hare and man, he did not look approachable.
-Felt guilty for logging onto to a social networking account during work.
-Is in denial about a recent disagreement I had with … oh, I forget who.

2 comments:

Shazza said...

You split and infinitive?

Have you no shame man?

neetzy said...

Welcome back to blogville dude. Thanks for revealing so much intimate information about yourself. Now I know what to get for your housewarming present!